Health/Multiple Sclerosis
Multiple Sclerosis-
"MS is currently classified as an autoimmune disease of the central nervous system (brain, spinal cord). The disease attacks myelin, the protective covering of the nerves, causing inflammation and often damaging the myelin. Myelin is necessary for the transmission of nerve impulses through nerve fibres. If damage to myelin is slight, nerve impulses travel with minor interruptions; however, if damage is substantial and if scar tissue replaces the myelin, nerve impulses may be completely disrupted, and the nerve fibres themselves can be damaged.
(Taken from the M.S. Society.ca website)
I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis 1 month after my 18th birthday. I woke up like every other day to get ready to go to school. But as I went to move to get out of my bed, my right leg wouldn't move. I frantically called for my mom and we both thought maybe I pinched a nerve in my back. My leg felt completely numb and I was sure that seeing a Chiropractor would help fix it. But the Chiropractor sent me to my Doctor and the Doctor sent me to a Neurologist. Within 3 days I was having my first MRI and a week later I was told I had Multiple Sclerosis.
One of the worst things you can do is google what you have. *Guilty* By the end of the day I was beside myself in tear. I thought I had 10 years until I was in a wheelchair and 20-30 before it killed me. I felt numb and continued to live in denial for many many years. Especially after the M.S. turned to remission and I got the use of my leg back.
Its been almost 8 years from my initial diagnosis and I am happy to say that I have full use on all of my limbs. But it hasn't come without its challenges and obstacles. My back and ribs are often numb and I can't feel when I pinch myself. If you look closely I have a slight limp that I have gotten good at hiding. It gets worse if I overwork myself though. Sometimes my bladder works, other times it doesn't and thats what catheters are for. I have chronic fatigue, nerve pain and more.
This point of this isn't to complain about all the things M.S. took away from me. It used to be. I would cry about dreams I could no longer have, the fact that I was scared to dream at all. I set the bar so low for myself that I had no aspirations to be anything at all. I got to the point where I was content being a mediocre wife and mom. I told myself "I can't, I won't" so many times, that I fell into a depression. I would hide away to be alone in my room. I cried all the time, feeling hopeless for myself.
Im so glad this wasn't the end of my story, although it could have been. I sought out help, I came to terms that yes this is my new way of life. But this was not how my life would end. I started dreaming again, I started to push myself farther. I wanted to live.
M.S. gets mad at me when I do too much. But I fight back because this is my life to live. I don't want to waste my life stuck in a rut; stuck convincing myself I am not good enough, and that I never will be. Because I am good enough, and I always will be. Im strong enough, smart enough and worthy enough to become anyone or thing I set my mind to. And guess what? You are too! You are enough, you are smart and you are worthy.
Maybe you don't have M.S. but you have something else either physically or mentally. You can do it. Don't be afraid to live, to dream and to discover all that life has to offer. You have one life to live, do you want to waste it? I know I don't. I know Ive been called for so much more. While I was stuck thinking about myself I missed the point. That maybe it isn't about me at all. That there is so much need in the world and God can use me, use the broken and sick me. I don't know what my future holds, but I know who holds the future. Im not scared anymore. I didn't realize how trapped I was until I was set free. Freedom friends? Its an amazing feeling.
Let me know, are you "sick" what are you struggling with? You are not alone. <3
"MS is currently classified as an autoimmune disease of the central nervous system (brain, spinal cord). The disease attacks myelin, the protective covering of the nerves, causing inflammation and often damaging the myelin. Myelin is necessary for the transmission of nerve impulses through nerve fibres. If damage to myelin is slight, nerve impulses travel with minor interruptions; however, if damage is substantial and if scar tissue replaces the myelin, nerve impulses may be completely disrupted, and the nerve fibres themselves can be damaged.
(Taken from the M.S. Society.ca website)
I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis 1 month after my 18th birthday. I woke up like every other day to get ready to go to school. But as I went to move to get out of my bed, my right leg wouldn't move. I frantically called for my mom and we both thought maybe I pinched a nerve in my back. My leg felt completely numb and I was sure that seeing a Chiropractor would help fix it. But the Chiropractor sent me to my Doctor and the Doctor sent me to a Neurologist. Within 3 days I was having my first MRI and a week later I was told I had Multiple Sclerosis.
One of the worst things you can do is google what you have. *Guilty* By the end of the day I was beside myself in tear. I thought I had 10 years until I was in a wheelchair and 20-30 before it killed me. I felt numb and continued to live in denial for many many years. Especially after the M.S. turned to remission and I got the use of my leg back.
Its been almost 8 years from my initial diagnosis and I am happy to say that I have full use on all of my limbs. But it hasn't come without its challenges and obstacles. My back and ribs are often numb and I can't feel when I pinch myself. If you look closely I have a slight limp that I have gotten good at hiding. It gets worse if I overwork myself though. Sometimes my bladder works, other times it doesn't and thats what catheters are for. I have chronic fatigue, nerve pain and more.
This point of this isn't to complain about all the things M.S. took away from me. It used to be. I would cry about dreams I could no longer have, the fact that I was scared to dream at all. I set the bar so low for myself that I had no aspirations to be anything at all. I got to the point where I was content being a mediocre wife and mom. I told myself "I can't, I won't" so many times, that I fell into a depression. I would hide away to be alone in my room. I cried all the time, feeling hopeless for myself.
Im so glad this wasn't the end of my story, although it could have been. I sought out help, I came to terms that yes this is my new way of life. But this was not how my life would end. I started dreaming again, I started to push myself farther. I wanted to live.
M.S. gets mad at me when I do too much. But I fight back because this is my life to live. I don't want to waste my life stuck in a rut; stuck convincing myself I am not good enough, and that I never will be. Because I am good enough, and I always will be. Im strong enough, smart enough and worthy enough to become anyone or thing I set my mind to. And guess what? You are too! You are enough, you are smart and you are worthy.
Maybe you don't have M.S. but you have something else either physically or mentally. You can do it. Don't be afraid to live, to dream and to discover all that life has to offer. You have one life to live, do you want to waste it? I know I don't. I know Ive been called for so much more. While I was stuck thinking about myself I missed the point. That maybe it isn't about me at all. That there is so much need in the world and God can use me, use the broken and sick me. I don't know what my future holds, but I know who holds the future. Im not scared anymore. I didn't realize how trapped I was until I was set free. Freedom friends? Its an amazing feeling.
Let me know, are you "sick" what are you struggling with? You are not alone. <3
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